A Lesson in Procrastination?

Two turtles go camping and pack a cooler with sandwiches and booze. After three days of walking, they arrive at a great spot but realize they've forgotten a bottle opener. The first turtle turns to the second and says, "You've gotta go back and get the opener or else we have no beer."

"No way," says the second. "By the time I get back, you will have eaten all the food."

"I promise I won't," says the first turtle. "Just hurry!"

Nine full days pass and there's still no sign of the second turtle. Aggravated and starving, the first turtle digs into the sandwiches. Suddenly, the second turtle pops out from behind a rock and yells, "I knew it! I'm not fucking going!"

Training Day | July 11th

"I didn't know you liked to get wet?!"

So here's a story about from a couple weeks back... I woke up early to try to get an iPhone around 8:30am... the place opened at 9am... so 8 somethin i got up... fed the cat... and tried to let it outside.

Now.. my job.. here at my relatives house.. is to housesit.. to take care of this cat and the house... so normally after the cat eats it runs out... but this morning she didn't want to go outside for some reason... but I couldn't leave it in the house or it would claw shit up which my aunt said not to do...

So I start chasing this fucker... while she bolts to the living room... under chairs... tables... bolts to the bedrooms... under the bed I'M sleeping in... try to grab her... cant reach her..

Finally I realized I was wasting time... had to go.. didn't have time for this shit... pulled my sleeves up on the hoodie and grabbed that fucker ready for the claws and biting

Sure enough... it clawed and bit... and yelled... I said fuck it.. just take it out..... but once i started lifting it started FUCKIN PEEING.

Pee'd all over the fuckin bed... floors... hallway... dining room.. all the way until I threw her out

How's THAT for a fuckin story. Picture of the culprit below.

So while looking in the paper for jobs... I found what I alllways wanted... the Olsen twins on the bonnet and britney on the doors.

I would pay $50k for it... $50,500 is pushin it.

omgwtfbbqduracellbunny

Who the fuck is this?!?! What happened to the bunny with the shades and drums.

ok ok ok...

This is now officially my own adventures in Australia. 20 years in Hawaii. 8 years in the Bay Area, 1 month in Australia.

Here goes...

Shitty pic above is of Sydney. 3 hours at the airport. 10 hour flight. 2 hour layover. 1 hour flight to Melbourne. My final destination.

Got here on June 12th. Since then did nothing but eat and sleep. Had to setup new bank accounts, switch over the cell phone (umm.. excuse me mobile phone).. and setup some Gov't stuff.

Luckily it's easy to switchover driver's license from the US, just show em and you get it.

Then around the 20th it was time to go car shopping... found a Japan vehicle importer.. which had quite an array of cars. Like a kid in a candy store.


Walked to the front and saw something I liked..

After about a week of getting it registered here from Japan, road tests, etc.. It finally got released around the 29th.

Next step is finishin up some more tax paperwork so I can work... then it's off to the rat race here. We'll see what happens. F it.